Just One

I've been thinking for a long time about what it is that makes it hard for a person to lose weight.

Most of us know what we have to do. Eat less, exercise more, cut out foods that have more calories than nutrients, and we'll be able to lose and maintain a healthy weight. So why is it so hard for so many?

I think one of the main reasons is forgetfulness. We continue to think that an extra unnecessary little indulgence that we allow ourselves is the only one. (An extra cookie a day can lead to a 3-6 pound weight gain over the course of a year if we don't change something else.)

We have a cookie after lunch. Just one, as part of a balanced diet that's not bad. But mid afternoon we've forgotten all about the cookie as we eat, just one, handful of chips or popcorn. After dinner we have just one glass of wine or beer, with just one or two snacks, maybe a second helping of potatoes that we didn't really need.

All of these just one indulgences that we allow ourselves in the course of a day can add up to several hundred/thousand extra calories that our bodies don't really need. Just one store bought muffin with coffee is 400 calories. It would take an hour of flat out running to burn that much off.

The reason we don't take steps to change as well is because of this just one problem. Just one more day. I'll start eating right tomorrow.

Why do we think that the road to eating well is a long hard one that we must put off, all the while eating just one more candy after dinner?

We are bad at math, and bad at remembering.

I think I've figured out how to turn this just one mentality to an advantage. I got the idea from Alcoholics Anonymous. I've never been to an AA meeting so really I got the idea from the idea I have of AA from the way it's portrayed on TV.

Addicts have to take it one day at a time. If they look at the years and years stretching in front of them and try to face it without another drink it's overwhelming.

Well, we are essentially food addicts, creatures of habit, eating without thought usually. Let's use the same concept for ourselves shall we?

For just one day I will eat only what I need.
For just one day I will stop eating as soon as I'm not hungry.
For just one day I will taste my food and be thankful for every bite, noticing the flavor, smell and texture.
For just one day I will not snack after dinner, or lunch.
For just one day I will be thankful for the body I have, that works as well as it does, and will honor the gift by taking care of it.
For just one day I will move and stretch and enjoy being in my body.
For just one day I will feed my hungry senses with things that aren't food; fresh air, flowers, aromatic lotions, scented candles, etc.


I can do all this for just one day.

You can too.

The pretty cookies above were photographed by Sifu Renka. The photo is used under the terms of a Creative Commons License.

Cinnamon Sticks are a Fun Snack

Are your kids bugging you for dessert, again? Are you wandering around your kitchen feeling snacky and wanting to put something in your mouth but you're not really hungry? Have you ever tried a cinnamon bark?

Cinnamon sticks are those things that usually come as a garnish for fancy apple cider or hot chocolate drinks. What they are made of is rolled up cinnamon bark. It's the same substance that you have ground up in a jar in your spice cupboard. Cinnamon is just the bark from a particular tree.

So, if you like cinnamon, try taking one of these little sticks or whole pieces and chewing on it for a while. It tastes good, and has the added benefit of regulating your metabolism. This in turn helps to curb your cravings, as well as the really strong flavor. The calories in cinnamon bark are negligible so it's a great thing to have on hand if you are trying to curb a snack addiction too.

My kids think I'm so generous when I let them have a whole cinnamon stick to themselves!

Tea, make it a part of your diet, and your holiday treats

My mother's family is Irish, my dad's, British and Irish. I come from a long line of tea drinkers, a looong line. My mother used to have travel tea cups that coordinated with her wardrobe. If anything happens in her family it's accompanied by the brewing of a strong pot of tea and sitting down at the table. My father's parents like to take their tea very seriously, cream first, then tea, always with the silver, never pour the cream from the carton, always from the pretty cream pitcher. You get the idea.

The reason I bring it up is that tea can be a big help to those who want to curb some automatic eating habits. For example, my grandparents always have tea after dinner, with dessert. There is something about a hot cup of tea that makes people slow down, and pay attention, and eat less. There is something about waiting for the water to boil, and the tea to brew, before sitting down with a pretty plate of dessert that keeps me anyway from gorging myself.

The prospect of the combination keeps me from sneaking extra before hand, and keeps me from sneaking extra after. If I'm thinking about a hot cup of tea and the perfect little cookie, or piece of pie, it actually stops me from tasting it before hand and helps me to keep sweets for only that occasion. Good china helps to create that sense of occasion, as does an uncluttered pretty table. By creating these moments with our food, the atmosphere, the heightened awareness, we can bring ourselves out of the habit of eating at random, grazing while standing, and into a ritualistic enjoyment of our food that keeps us from over eating or mindless snacking. I find that the more I plan what I am going to eat, the more attention I give to menus and shopping and preparation, the less I eat. It's a strange paradox, but anticipation works to keep me from eating on the go or the first moment I feel hungry because I want to wait to enjoy the meal I have planned. This goes for planned snack food too.

So as the holiday season moves closer and those once a year treats start appearing on your table, and sometimes around your middle try this. When someone gives you a box of chocolates, don't open it up and pass it around just yet, or leave it sitting on a credenza so you can pop one in your mouth every time you have occasion to pass. Put it away in a drawer, or cupboard, and save it for after a meal. Brew a steaming cup of tea, the choices are endless you'll find one you like, and put on or two little tastes on pretty plates. Eat slowly, savor the tea, your family and friends around you, and enjoy those treats. And then put them away again, until you have another occasion to enjoy a cup of tea. Or ask for gourmet tea blends, or coffee if you don't like tea, instead of baked treats and chocolates. And enjoy savoring this almost guilt free indulgence year round.

For a middle of the day visit with family, take another tip from the British and add to your tea, sandwiches, and other finger foods that have some protein in them and are good for you to balance out the sugar. Plan to eat more lightly at supper to make up for it.

Here are some of my favorite homemade blends:

Lavender Earl Grey

1 cup hood quality Earl Grey Blend loose tea

2 tsp lavender flowers

Combine and store in an airtight jar. To brew, pour boiling water into a pot with the tea. About 1 tbsp to 1-2 cups water.


Ginger and Fennel Roiboos

This tea is wonderful on a chilly night. The fennel seed is naturally sweet so I find it doesn't need any thing extra. Roiboos (South African red tea) is very high in antioxidants, one of the highest sources in the world.

4-5 slices ginger root

1 tbsp fennel seeds

4 whole cloves

1/4 cup roiboos leaves

Combine, keep in fridge unless the ginger you are using is dried. I fresh cut the ginger before each brewing and keep the rest together in a jar.

Steep in hot water for at least 5 minutes before serving. Try this with dates and mandarin oranges, two winter delights that are fun to eat and set the table with. And perhaps one chocolate truffle too once in a while.

With indulgences like these in store, it almost makes me look forward to colder weather.

Supersize it-American portions sizes are out of control

Indulge me a bit while I rant about portion sizes. Last week was at the store still at 6pm when we like to eat dinner. (Using my coupon to buy 20 lbs of chicken at $0.49 a lb if you must know, and I'm going back tomorrow for another 40lbs and then I won't have to buy chicken for at least two months I expect, maybe longer. I shop the sales and then stock up, it's cheaper.) Anyway, I was feeling very behind and needed to think about dinner for the kids and I. Between the grocery store and home on the route that we walk is a Wendy's, and a Boston Market. (The cheapest thing would have been to turn around and walk back into the store to purchase one of their rotisserie chickens for $6 or so. But I didn't feel like dragging my children all the way to the back of the store and then go through the checkout all over again. But I digress. I went for Boston Market. I figured home style meals with fresh ingredients and things like green beans and mashed potatoes on the menu was a better option than cheeseburgers.

I bought 1/2 of a rotisserie chicken and two sides. While I waited for them to dish up my order I happened to glance at the menu and realized that I had just ordered from the individual meals menu. I worried about there being enough for dinner. Well, when I brought it home and put it all on one of my large serving dishes it filled the dish quite nicely. There was enough food there for me and my children and I still have some leftover chicken in my fridge that we didn't eat.

Which leads to my conclusion, as mentioned in the title.

My in-laws are sometimes this way about dessert. I say I can bring some brownies or make some cookies and they respond, "Okay, we'll get some ice cream and make some fudge sauce too so that there is enough for everyone." Granted there are many teenage boys at that house but I didn't know that dessert came in meal sized portions. It seems to my way of thinking that dessert is for taste and that two cookies or one large brownie is plenty.

Portion sizes are out of control, and so are waistlines, in direct proportion I'll venture. Why are we so afraid of being hungry? We've all done it. We stand in line at a fast food restaurant and we place our order, and then we think to ourselves, "Oh I'll just get some fries too in case I'm still hungry after the burger." Of course we eat all of the fries too, even though we weren't really hungry after all. Healthy eating experts say that we should only eat until we stop feeling hungry, not until we feel stuffed. Most of us don't feel satisfied enough to stop at not hungry. We have trained ourselves and our bodies to need to feel full before it clicks that we are finished eating. Friends, this is MESSED UP! It has to stop.

So I offer a few ideas that help me to rearrange my thinking and how I feel about how much I'm eating. I slip back into this pattern of eating from time to time and these usually work for me.

1.) Remind yourself that it's only one meal, there will be more. So you think you have room to stuff another little bit into your body before you're finished lunch. Dinner is only 5 hours away or so. You don't feel hungry right now, and you don't feel heavy, you can last 5 hours until you eat again. THIS IS NOT YOUR LAST MEAL EVER! YOU WILL BE HUNGRY AGAIN, AND YOU WILL EAT AGAIN! It's that simple. Stop acting like you need to stock up for later or your body will too and you will start to look like a refrigerator.

2.) This is stolen directly from French Women Don't Get Fat (see side bar) ask yourself if you can be satisfied with half of what's on your plate. Put the other half in a doggy bag if you are out or discard it. I've read about people pouring salt all over their leftovers so they aren't tempted to keep eating. I just ask them to take it away as soon as I'm done and take the rest home for later, or for my kids. (I hate to waste food.)

3.) Use a smaller plate. You will eat less and feel satisfied. Or put your food artfully in the very center of the plate and be sure to leave a wide margin around the perimeter.

4.) Use tiny pretty dishes for dessert. This works amazingly well. I have some lovely little bowls that I use for dessert. One tiny scoop of ice cream and a cookie or piece of fruit and it is full. It takes me just as long to eat as a large bowl because I unconsciously go slower and savor it more. My children are learning along with me that desert is just a taste of something yummy as a finish to a meal, not a meal in itself. It's now completely normal for me to eat just a little bit, instead of a giant bowl. I do the same for my husband. If he wants more he can get more later, but when I get dessert for him I give him a small portion. I've noticed since I started that he goes back for seconds less and less frequently, and so now I make it a point to offer to get things for him and I give him what I think is a reasonable portion.

5.) What's your hurry? Eating is not a race. Slow down and enjoy your food. You will feel satisfied sooner with less, simply because you were mindful of your meal. If you have a toddler, most of whom are notoriously slow eaters, try one day matching your eating speed to theirs, just to change your perception and reset your habits. You will find you're not as hungry as you thought.

6.) When you are finished eating get up and do something else to signal to yourself that the meal is definitely over. Brush your teeth, clear the table, have a cup of tea, whatever works for you. This will keep you from continuing to eat when it's time to stop.

Try doing these for a month or two and you will be surprised to find out how much food you were eating that your body didn't really need. You'll feel lighter, have more energy, and your clothes may even fit better. Go on give it a try, and then come back and tell me how it worked.

all about ice cream

A few weeks ago I went to Dairy Queen for dessert after my SIL's birthday party. I decided I may as well go all out and ordered the brownie mudslide something or other, not expecting to finish it, but thinking to enjoy a taste. I ended up throwing almost all of it out. The brownies didn't even taste like chocolate, more like corn syrup, ditto on the chocolate sauce. I was disappointed, but I also realize that I've been spoiled in the ice cream department. So here for your enjoyment this weekend are several ways to top your ice cream that you can make at home, simply, and are full of REAL FOOD.

My husband is a creative dessert genius so many of these are his specialties. He consistently makes blackberries taste better than anyone else I have known.

Blackberry Ginger Sauce

In a heavy bottomed sauce pan place:

12 oz of blackberries fresh or frozen. (One bag of frozen berries from Trader Joe's is the perfect size)

1/2 cup of honey

2-3 tsp minced ginger

Simmer over medium heat stirring occasionally. The berries will start to break down and turn into a syrup. It is quite alright if it is lumpy. Spoon over good quality vanilla ice cream and eat immediately. Any leftover can be stored in a jar in the fridge and keeps for at least two weeks. (It's never lasted longer than that around here so I don't know past that.)

If it's not sweet enough for you, add some more honey.

Raspberry Sauce

Repeat the steps above only leave out the ginger. Feel free to add cinnamon, to help your blood sugar stay stable. Remember, you are pouring this over sweet ice cream, so it doesn't have to be all that sweet itself, go for a nice balance once the two are combined. You can go on and do this with strawberries, I recommend less honey, and blueberries, and Saskatoons (but only if you are in Canada or somewhere far enough north to pick them.) You get the general idea.

My mother used to make home made chocolate sauce all the time when I was growing up. I've adapted her recipe somewhat as she added more sugar than I like.

Hot Fudge Sauce

In a double boiler melt some dark or bittersweet chocolate, once the chocolate has melted stir in cream until it is of a runny enough consistency to pour, or dollop over ice cream. Be careful not to over heat it or work it as it will become grainy. It will harden once on the ice cream and make a sort of crackle shell.

This will also keep in the fridge indefinitely but will need to be warmed again to reserve.

For less expensive versions of this you can start with butter and icing sugar and add cocoa powder and cream until it is smooth and fudgy. Or you can start with baker's chocolate and add sugar and cream. In both of these options you are in complete control of the sugar content, remember it is going with something already sweet. Serve it alone, or add strawberries, bananas, peanuts, etc. and make your own ice cream creations.

Finally we come to caramel sauce. There is a creamery in Bakersfield California that makes the best Caramel sauce I have ever tasted, it's called Rosemarie's and they also make their own ice cream. But since I don't live there and have only stopped through a few times on road trips, we have attempted to make our own, and it's as good I think. Caramel is really just caramelized sugar and butter. I've never tried to make it from scratch completely because real caramel is easy to find. So I start with caramels and a double boiler. Melt the caramels in the double boiler, add a bit more butter (unsalted) for a runnier consistency, and stir in a lot of cinnamon.
WARNING: This is highly addictive and you with find yourself wanting to lick the spoon, your fingers and anything else that gets some on it. This can be poured into a jar while warm and keeps in the cupboard indefinitely. It also needs to be reheated before you can pour it again.

So, if you plan to indulge this weekend, try some of these. They taste way better than anything you can find at the store, I promise. One final word about ice cream. Don't get the yucky fake stuff just because it's cheaper, there's a reason for it being cheaper, get some good quality ice cream and enjoy less of it, you don't need extra servings anyway. If the ingredients contain something other than milk, cream, eggs, sugar, vanilla, chocolate, or other natural flavors, especially if they have added oil, do not buy it. Brands that I can recommend are the Breyer's Original, (Not the new and improved creamy kind, it's not an improvement at all and not all natural anymore.) and Double Rainbow Vanilla and Chocolate Fudge available at Trader Joe's.

My Personal Weight Loss Plan

So, my postpartum body is kind of squishy. Since this is my third baby, it is predictably squishier than it has been before. Since I am entirely sick of my maternity wardrobe, and I gave away all of my clothes that are larger than a size six the last time I lost the baby weight, and I’m on a limited budget, I’d like to fit into my pre-pregnant wardrobe as soon as I can. I don’t own a scale, but my weight at the last midwife appointment 2 weeks ago was 168. I’m short so that really stacks up on me and even my T-shirts don’t fit. The weight I feel good at is around 130. That’s 38 pounds to lose. If I lose 1 1/2 lbs a week, I’ll look great in my favorite red dress by summer. As added incentive for myself, I hope to extract from the Genius Husband a promise that when said fabulous dress finally fits he will go with me to someplace cool enough to wear said fabulous dress to without any children in tow. (It was imagining myself in a great outfit, which I envisioned in itty-bitty detail, and attending the GH’s company Christmas party in it that kept me sprinting up and down our entrance steps 15 minutes a day to get rid of the last 10 lbs after the Girl was born. I didn’t have a treadmill back then, and stairs use the largest muscle group and so burn the most calories and I didn’t have much time so I needed to move faster and it seemed like the most efficient blahdy blah blah blah… Anyway the very specific goal provided the needed incentive to add exercise to my crazy days. I had many other far more worthy and long term goals, such as good health, strength, teaching my children to take care of their bodies by taking care of mine, and the memory of how much better it feels to move and be when not carrying extra weight around, but it was picturing the outfit that actually got me off of my butt and tying up my shoes. I guess my inner couch potato is shallow like that. Use what motivates you.)

So I have a plan to make this happen. I already do many things that will help me, as you know. I don’t eat processed fats, I eat fruits and vegetables, I eat whole grains, I avoid sugar, white flour, and sinple starches, I don’t drink sweetened beverages, and I drink a lot of water. (Oh yeah, and I’m breastfeeding which takes care of an extra 500 calories a day.)

So here’s what I’m going to add to that because pregnancy has changed my eating habits enough that I need to alter them again now that I’m not.

1.) No snacking/unplanned eating. I will only eat breakfast lunch and dinner if I can. Because I know that my blood sugar will drop and produce cravings if there is too long an interval between these meals, and breastfeeding tends to make me hungry more often, I will also plan what I will do in case that happens. So, I will have on hand things to eat in emergencies. These will be almonds, soy nuts, fruit, and vegetables. I already carry a small bag of soy nuts or almonds in my purse wherever I go. What I want to add to this is portion control. I plan to divide the almonds and soy nuts into individual portion sizes, either in zip lock bags or the reusable mini plastic containers that I use for my kids. This will keep me from eating too much. I will have to think about whether or not I am hungry enough to get myself a second portion. I’ve gotten into the habit of constant snacking in order to meet the pregnant protein requirements and this will help stop it.
2.) No eating while standing, sit down to eat, always.
3.) No eating while reading, watching TV, driving, etc. Only eating at the table during meals, or snacks. I already do this most of the time, though sometimes I find my eyes wandering for reading material during breakfast.
4.) Relearn portion sizes. I’m thinking of buying a scale to measure portions for a while until I remember what a real portion is, instead of the supersize me version. (I got this idea from French Woman Don’t Get Fat.)
5.) Exercise at least 30 minutes every day. My preferred method is to go for a brisk walk outside somewhere pretty, but since I have small children that isn’t always possible, they walk too slow and I don’t usually have help with childcare. So I have alternatives. I have a treadmill, I have exercise videos, I have belly-dancing videos, I have a weighted hula-hoop that’s great for ab muscles; I try not to get bored. My kids often exercise with me. As an addendum to this I want to sit on the floor as often as possible and stretch for a while when sitting. This would be watching shows, talking on the phone, directing my children as they clean up, etc. I’m chronically inflexible, and lot of workout time for me goes to stretching so I’m trying to do that during my regular day so that it doesn’t steal time from other things and keep me from my workout goal.
6.) If I’m still hungry after a meal with my revised portion size, I may have seconds, of salad. I always make too much anyways, this will keep it from going to waste.
7.) This one is entirely unique to myself I expect. I will not eat more Challah bread after the Shabbat meal. I will eat the piece that comes with dinner and not attack the rest of the loaf after dinner and eat it with thick slabs of butter. I’ve been kind of letting myself go on Shabbat but really, extra bread and dessert together is not exactly balanced.

The main goals of my plan of course are to avoid eating more than I need, and to make my body stronger through exercising it. I still plan to eat dessert a couple of times a week even butter every so often and to enjoy my food even more by giving it my full attention instead of mindlessly stuffing it in my mouth while I stand in the kitchen preoccupied by other things. I have found with exercise that it has to be something that I enjoy, not necessarily a “fun” activity, but something that makes it possible for me to take pleasure in the way my body is moving and working. Walking is the best activity for me, though dancing and aerobics come close. When I’m stronger and more fit, I enjoy running too, I like the feel of my strong legs and lungs as I settle into pace. I’m not there right now, but hope to return eventually. Once every week or two I will try on my favorite jeans again to see if I can do them up yet. So far I can get them up, but there is a gap at least 5 inches wide between the buttons, and the thighs are very tight. If I come across a scale I’ll weigh myself, which won’t be very reliable information since it won’t be the same scale but I’ll share anyway. I’ll let you know how it goes.

Kicking the Sweets Addiction

I have been asked by some people to talk about kicking the sugar and caffeine habit. We all know too much sugar is bad for you, we all know too much coffee can be bad for you too. In fact too much of just about anything can be bad for you.

I’m not going to try and convince you that these things are bad in excess, you probably already know. But I will give you a few tidbits to maybe help strengthen someone’s resolve. Sugar affects our body in several ways. It suppresses white blood cell production for up to 3 hours after you eat it, weakening your immune system, it causes insulin spikes in our blood which are then followed by lower blood sugar which can mean anything from headaches to cravings for more sugar to irritability to increased appetite to, in my case, irrational fits of weeping and sometimes vomiting when it gets too low. This becomes a vicious cycle for some people, and can really mess with your quality of life. The average adult female shouldn’t be eating more than 19 grams of sugar a day according to an article I once read in a natural living hippy style magazine, which isn’t much. (I wanted to find it for you, but I don’t even remember the name of the magazine, just that one fact that has followed me around ever since.)

So here are a few things that have helped me along the way to deal with diet excesses. I have gone cold turkey several times, eating absolutely no sugar at all. The benefit of doing this is that after about a week or two I really stopped wanting it, there were no cravings, I lost interest completely. The downfall of this method is that once I allowed myself a little taste again, I had very little control over how much and usually returned to eating sugar somewhat mindlessly in a matter of weeks after the first birthday cake or whatever it was that I allowed myself to have. What has made the most difference over the longest period of time is to become a bit of a snob, or connoisseur when it comes to sweets. I only eat it if it’s really REALLY good. And then I only need a little bit to be satisfied.

So if I was going to try to get rid of a sugar habit this is what I would do.

To start with, go two weeks at least without any kind of processed sugar thing. Don’t eat candy, don’t eat cake, don’t sweeten your coffee, don’t eat candy bars, etc. Do eat lots and lots of fresh fruit. Right now oranges are in season in the stores, get the little Clementine’s that you can peel and eat, get apples; I think the imported pineapples are fresh right now too. Anyway, the point is to satisfy your craving for sweets with fresh fruits, which are sweet and full of water. When you have a sweet craving, drink a glass of water, often re-hydrating makes the craving go away. At the start of this week throw away all of your sweets, don’t give it to someone else or eat it all before you start the week, throw it in the garbage. This might be hard; you may feel wasteful. You need to reprogram your brain to realize that this kind of food is junk and you don’t need it, seeing it at the bottom of the trash bin will help with that.

At the end of the second week go out and buy some really good dark chocolate. It can’t be milk chocolate, and it can’t be made by Hershey or Nestle. Look for dark chocolate, at least 70% solid cocoa mass. If you are near a Trader Joe’s they sell bars of single origin dark chocolate. Just like coffee cocoa beans have different qualities depending on where they’re grown. You can taste a difference. Most chocolate is blended and homogenized so that it all tastes the same, which is very sad. Most Americans have never tasted real chocolate as a result. Instead they have tasted chocolate flavored sugar wax. TJ’s also sells single origin chocolates, from three different countries in individually wrapped squares in gift packets, which is perfect because it’s built in portion control. If you can’t find good chocolate where you live, look online, I’ve seen some really tasty looking chocolate available online.

After you find your chocolate, your indulgence, don’t you dare eat it out of the wrapper on the way home. Make a nice meal; sit down at the table to eat it. Enjoy it. When dinner is over, or lunch, take out one square of chocolate, maybe pour a little glass of 15 year old antique tawny port, (If you have a husband who keeps it stocked, mine does, and it goes so well with chocolate) and slowly eat the chocolate. Pay attention to the texture, the flavor. Let it melt in your mouth, don’t chew it, pay attention to the smell, the look, the flavors. If it is a truly rich dark chocolate, you won’t want to have any more after you eat it as I’ve described. You will be satisfied. Depending on how much sugar you want to allow yourself, have a square a day, or only twice a week, but look forward to it. Plan when you are going to indulge, make sure it is with a meal for the sake of keeping the insulin from spiking and your cravings along with it. Looking forward to the chocolate should keep you from wanting to mindlessly snack on other less satisfying sweets. A candy bar, after a couple of weeks will taste waxy to you and you’ll wonder why you ate them.

After learning to love real chocolate, stick to a few rules. Plan to indulge, to keep yourself looking forward to something to keep you from binging. Only eat sugar after a meal, never by itself. Eat slowly, pay attention to it, and make it an event. Pay attention to the first three bites, give them all of your attention and you may find you are satisfied and don’t need any more. Give yourself permission to leave food on the plate. If the first bite doesn’t taste good, don’t eat any more.

Our whole family keeps Fridays and Sundays for indulgences. On Friday we share the Shabbat meal with family, and there is usually desert, on Sunday evenings it’s usually ice cream. My kids know to expect this treat and look forward to it. If they ask for something in the middle of the week, I tell them we can have it on Sunday, or Friday. We are all learning delayed gratification. When the boy wanted to try candy making thanks to a craft book, we made them and then waited to taste them until Shabbat, when we shared with everyone. When we lived in Canada there was a bakery near us that made the best Nanaimo bars, if you’re not Canadian you’ve probably never even heard of one much less tasted it. Believe me a good one is amazing. For weeks on end my planned Sunday indulgence was a Nanaimo Bar from that bakery. They were closed on Sundays, so every Saturday afternoon I would walk to the bakery and get my one bar and take it home. It would wait on top of the fridge until after lunch on Sunday, and then I would eat my one treat for that week. Anticipation does great things for our eating habits if we can use it to our advantage. I was able to pass up all sorts of temptations by mentally comparing them to my treat and rejecting them because they weren’t as good. If something did catch my eye, I would save it for Sunday and look forward to it instead.

One word about hidden sugar. Sugar is in everything these days, disguised as soup and crackers and bread and peanut butter. Read labels and try to eliminate as much hidden sweetener from your diet as possible, you’ll not only help your waistline, but you’ll keep yourself from the kinds of continued cravings that eating high sugar foods can cause which creates a vicious spiral effect where you eat more sugar and then crave more and then eat more an then crave more and you end up feeling sick.

I am less helpful when it comes to caffeine because I don’t like coffee. Here are a couple of things that may help those that do. Try not to drink it sweet or creamy since the sugar and fat have the opposite effect on your brain and you may need more to keep going. Drink more water!! In the morning before reaching for your cup of coffee try drinking two large glasses of water first. You may find yourself feeling much more alert even before you take your caffeine hit. Try the water thing throughout the day as well. Since I don’t drink caffeinated beverages I have to rely on other things to keep me going, like napsJ, but water does help a lot, as does eating foods high in fiber and protein at regular intervals throughout the day. If you find you still need stimulants there are drinks like Yerba Mate, which is a very strong tea, or matcha, which is powdered green tea from special leaves that my husband claims works as well as coffee. If you just really love the taste think of it the same way as chocolate or another indulgence. Treat yourself to really great coffee less often. Get some really aromatic dark roast espresso or something that you coffee lovers rave about, and enjoy a cup or two a day and stop there.

I hope this helps those who were asking. One last bit of advice is to read French Women Don’t get Fat that is linked in the side bar. She is really interesting and really helpful to those of us with a sweet tooth and a desire to enjoy things in moderation.

Why it helps to eat tasty food.

I love turkey dinner, my husband thinks I’m weird that way, but you have to make a really dry turkey before I’ll not like to eat it. I like the mashed potatoes that usually accompany it, I like stuffing, I like sweet potatoes. I usually eat too much when faced with a turkey dinner, even before we factor in the desserts that usually accompany it.

This holiday season I dragged by postpartum body, my newborn, and my not quite as well groomed as usual older children to two Christmas parties. The first was with family, and it had the usual suspects, turkey, ham, potatoes, dessert, cheese, nuts, etc. I had to laugh when I realized that the mass of green gelatin on my plate, which did look quite pretty, with a hint of celery or something inside was what the sweet older family member was talking about when she kept saying salad. I laughed in my sleeve because she had worked hard. The other salad had more gelatin and cool whip and canned pears. I found myself actually craving cruciferous vegetables, but then, my hemoglobin was low and I need extra iron so we can blame that. Right?

It was fine as far as meals go, I ate, and then I went back for more potatoes and ham, I ate more cheese, I had a lot of dessert so I could sample everything, and took home nut and fruit goody bags.

The next night, we went to a friend’s house for her annual feast. She had veggies with yummy dips for appetizers. There was ham, and beef, maybe brisket I’m not sure, and green beans with a chipotle butter on them, and yams in lime juice and cilantro, and green salad, and creamy mashed potatoes, and a carrot salad, and it all tasted amazing. She had a trifle for dessert and little ginger shortbread cookies, (Trader Joe’s) and chocolates. I filled my plate once, and didn’t want to go back for seconds; my senses were completely satisfied. After enjoying some excellent wine, (Yay I can drink wine again) I finally looked at the dessert, had a small bowl of trifle, two tiny cookies, and one chocolate. I was done, and satisfied, and only wanted to drink a lot of water after that because I was thirsty.

This brings home two lessons for me. The first is that they say the more flavor in your food, the less you are likely to eat, because your appetite is satisfied sooner with the memorable food especially if you eat slowly enough to taste it the first time. Remember, I LIKE turkey dinner, but it isn’t a strong flavored meal, especially that one. The trick to avoiding over eating is to make sure your sense are satisfied, not just your stomach but your nose and your mouth and your eyes.

The second is that when you are bored, no offense to husband’s extended family, stay away from food because you will eat more than you planned in order to have something to do. I've often been the victim of the party buffet table. It goes like this, you don't have anyone to talk to, so you go to the table and get some food, conversations start at the table so you stand next to it chatting, thanks goodness I'm married now and don't have to worry what the guy watching me stuff my nouth as I talk is thinking, not that that's necessarily a good thing. While chatting, you load up on more food, and then before leaving the table you fill a little plate with something and finally go sit down somewhere. On the way to the bathroom you stop at the table again for another taste of something, and once more on your way out the door and it's an awful lot of food before you're done. It can be done with alcohol also which is usually just as many calories and then you are loaded before you leave.

So, I've devised a solution to all of this that works for me. Take one pass at the table, put the tasitest looking things on a plate and WALK AWAY. Sit down somewhere near a group of people you know, or like, or if there aren't any, a bookshelf, or a large group with one person entertaining the others. Eat slowly, talk to people, or look at books, heck if the party is super boring and you can't leave find a bed and take a nap, (Okay that may depend on where you are and who you're with) the point is, don't go back and hang out at the food table. Don't look at longingly as you walk by, don't stare over the shoulder of the person you're talking to at the new plate of cookies on the table, stay away from the table. If you're really hungry and snacky, you may go back once, and only choose vegetables or whatever the most healthful options available are. DRINK WATER. It helps me if I decide this before I walk in the door. I can stick to it if It's something I've verbalized to myself that I intend to do.

So basically I guess my cure for eating when bored is to decide that I not gonna, not this time, and stick to it.